Thursday, August 04, 2011

diary ramadhan sha: root beer rani

Rootbeer Float 2 by TripleScoop
Rootbeer Float 2, a photo by TripleScoop on Flickr.
Ramadhan has come and all of the sudden I feel alive! Several months ago, I was having this down time where my brain simply couldn't function properly and I had not idea when it came to writing. The draft of my latest story, Guitar Hero is still under progress. I typed something and at the same time pressed backspace or delete button on my keyboard. At the end of the day...I realised that I was not writing anything at all!

Where was my romantic sense? I need words!

So, I checked on my Facebook. Besides taking time in reviewing all the books that I wanted to buy online, I had also looked into possibility of new things to do. I mean, I needed inspiration to write and it was not easy to squeeze your brain when all I could think of was all the vulgar words...errr...not a good thing to do...

Miraculously, that was the time when I realised that a bunch of my primary schoolmates were forming a group in Facebook! What? I thought that it could never worked! Come on. I have seen people struggling to keep college mates together. I saw empty reunions among secondary schoolmates. Those people were not really separated. They have seen each other quite number of times after school. They were all contactable. But only few attended the reunion.

So, in what sense would a reunion worked? Or even a mini gathering?
Especially for those who have been separated for more than 15 years?

Layan. That was what I had in mind. I knew that primary school was not all fun, bubbly and funny but how about looking at it from the view of an adult? Look back into the days where we played teng teng and galah panjang. Remember the days when a teacher canned us and made us cry. Or the times when you thought that you had nice voice so you joined choir. Or when your big boobs was the talk of the school.

I joined the club. I talked about the old times.

Yes, it was not all easy. There were times when I couldn't stop thinking about the time when the boys made fun of my runny nose. Or the times when I frowned. Or even the times when I ate the curry noodle while the others watching. Just because I was a daughter of a teacher. I said, when you looked at it as an adult, you would start to view things differently. There was a flash of anger, I had to admit that. I was a teacher's daughter whom being victimised by other teachers' words. And it was not something easy to forget.

But...who would have thought that I could go through it and even attended the first gathering! Yes. I made it! I had it! Even my mum was surprised to see to I had eventually accepted those years in my life as part of my life. Those were the teary years, if you knew me better. But those were also the years when I was Sha, who managed to run through the hurdles though she failed to catch the ball in the netball court:)

Frankly, I was nervous. What if they hate me? Or they look differently at me? I mean, they were not really my close friends. What if they start talking about my mum? Or how fierce she was in school? I could get defensive. Or worse, what if they make fun of my runny nose again?

My fingers shook when I put on my purple shirt. I was lucky, my driver was driving. When I arrived at A&W that evening, my confidence level was...almost zero. Or negative. I was damn scared.

That was...until I saw the familiar faces. Whomever the people was, they were not the same people I knew in school. A frog turned into a handsome prince, an ugly duckling turned into a swan, a sleeping beauty is no more asleep:)

People changed.

***to be continued***


cikpepel said...

ada perkara yg berlalu kalau boleh tak nak dikenang pun..ada perkara lak terlalu sayang untuk dilepaskan dr ingatan... time flies.

Anonymous said...

syoknya baca

~ Cik Azz ~ said...

Jangan nervous2 Sha...

Selamat berpuasa untuk Sha dan fmly.. :D